Why does my body not let me rest?

This past weekend was an extra long one due to MLK day.  Because of this, I had an extra day to sit around and do nothing really.  I had places to go and people to see, but between going to those places and seeing those people, I found myself bored out of my skull.  I didn't have homework to be doing, and all of my friends were either busy or contributing to society via their big kid jobs.  Basically, I was stuck in my room all weekend.  It was actually pretty boring.

Now, however, at 2am the night before classes start again, I find myself restless.  My body is telling me that I haven't done enough to warrant being tired.  I'm just laying in bed, twiddling my thumbs, waiting for sleep to hit me.  Then my brain starts working overtime.

You know that feeling when you are just about to get to sleep, but then you realize every little thing that is wrong in your life and needs correcting?  Yes, that is exactly what's going on in my mind.  I can't stop thinking.  I'm thinking about my grad school applications and when I will be finding out about them.  I'm thinking about what McDonalds I will have to work at if I don't get into a grad school.  I'm thinking about how to make my last semester a good one, and I'm thinking about all the stupid things I say on a daily basis.

I don't know what about laying in bed trying to not think brings on all the thoughts, but it does.  I think about relationships that are different now than a year ago and how I can make them better.  I think about who is actually reading this blog or is this just for me.  I think about traveling and where I would want to go.  Then I start thinking about other people.  I flip through Twitter hoping that none of my friends are up because it's 2am and nobody should be up, but then it would be better if they were up because then I would have someone to talk to instead of ranting on my blog.

Of course, I jinx my sleep by thinking about the next day.
"If I go to bed right now, I will get exactly 5 hours and 40 minutes of sleep" I tell myself.  Just by thinking about sleep, I'm dooming myself.

Why are we not made with a nice ON/OFF switch?  It would be so much easier if I could get into bed, turn off my brain, and go out like a light until I needed to wake up.

This is why I hate thinking about what is coming up.  I stay in the present because if I think about the future too much, I will over think and I will never be able to sleep.  I hate having to wait for anything, so if I'm thinking about what I want, I will just want it now, instead of whenever it is supposed to happen.  I don't want to think about graduation because it will distract from the rest of this semester.  This is the semester that I hope to get the most out of.

I don't want to have tunnel vision, only worrying about one thing.  I want to worry about everything as it happens.