What I've Been Up To

Welp, it has certainly been a while.

Since my last post I have:

• Started graduate school
• Written 10+ papers
• Interviewed 3 faculty members
• Fell in love with Dance Marathon
• Have so many adventures with my amazing roommates
• Celebrated a birthday
• Visited 3 different universities
• Interviewed some amazing candidates for my grad program
• Attended my first professional conference

I'm sure there are more things I have accomplished in the past few months, but as a sit in the Tampa airport waiting to fly back to Ohio, that is all I can think of.

My goal of this blog was going to be highlighting parts of my life that showed that I was growing up and my resistance to that.  However this past semester has taught me something different.

I used to believe that once I went to grad school I would have to be a grown adult and [arts of my life that were deemed "childish" would be over.  Now I realize that I can have just as much fun as I did in college.  A night in with my roommates usually results in my sides physically hurting because we are laughing so much.  My students appreciate that I am not formal all the time (even though I am always wearing my advisor pants).

This past week in Tampa has validated the field of student affairs for me.  I attended several sessions about self care and how to be a better practitioner, as well as sessions geared specifically to the functional areas I am both in and want to get into.  During these sessions I was able to learn new techniques, but I was also able to have genuine discussions with people who felt the same way I do about student development.  This week could not have come at a better time.

I had started to feel like I was not making a difference in what I was doing.  I want to give back to the field of student affairs that has given me so much, however I have be unable to find that opportunity as of late.  This past week has shown me that everyone has an opportunity to give back to the field, I just have not found it yet.

Thus, I have decided to change the overall theme of this blog.  I used to blog about random events that happened and thought deeply about what metaphor that presented in my life when it came to me becoming an adult.  Well, now I'm an adult.  Thankfully, I'm an adult that still likes to have fun with my people and that will not be changing anytime soon.  For now, this blog will serve as my inspiration to inspire the next generation of student affairs professionals.  I came into this field randomly, thanks to the belief from mentors during my undergraduate days.  Now it is my turn to Pay it Forward.

I have a lot to say, and I am going to start...

Right...

NOW!

So posting on the regular is a thing now?

Alright, I haven't posted in a while.  My bad.  But I want to get back into blogging.  It was a lot of fun because I got to just say whatever I was feeling and you would have to read it.  But really, only about 7 of you will read it, most of which will be family.

Anyway, this summer I did a lot of "adulting", starting off with making the word adulting.  It should be added to the Webster's Dictionary within the next year or so.  So what did I do since the last time I blogged.  Let's see, I've:

- Graduated college
- Signed a lease on an apartment
- Created a budget (kinda)
- Had just a few late night talks with members of my family about being an adult
- Went to 2 weddings (with 2 more coming up)
- Attempted to make lifestyle changes
- Failed at some of those lifestyle changes
- Pledged to actually make those changes once grad school starts
- Packed for graduate school
- Watched a whole lot of Netflix
- Played even more video games

To me, this was a pretty productive summer.  I did some reading, both for fun and for grad school.  I'm starting to feel like an actual adult.  While I still have a little ways to go, I know that once I get to Bowling Green I'll make it work.  Along with the fair share of adulting I did, I also had some time to be a kid.  Between waking up at noon, staying up really late at night and playing video games in my pajamas, I'm sure I scare people when I tell them I'm going to graduate school.

But this is what summer is to me.  I like having the time to do absolutely nothing.  Normally I'm a person that is always on the move and rarely has time to relax.  Summer is the chance for me to let loose by nothing doing anything all day long.  Some people see this as lazy, while I try to look at it as I am preparing for the upcoming year where I won't be allowed lazy days.

Now my summer is ending.  I have two more days in Illinois before I depart for Ohio.  In that time I'm going to be packing, watching the second Sharknado movie and getting a tattoo.  This has been a great summer for me and I'm sad to be leaving.  At least I'll be leaving feeling a lot better about myself and my future.

I guess this means I've made it... temporarily

Welp... I graduated college. See below for proof

Yep, that's me getting my diploma. Well, the holder really.  I'll have to wait around 90 days to get the actual thing, but it still counts.

Graduation was a crazy experience.  I hooted and hollered for my best friends, and they did the same for me.  I was having pictures taken of me left and right.  This is about the only time I'll feel like a celebrity.  I managed to hold back tears until a line in my alma mater.  There were over 600 people in my graduating class, and I think I was one of maybe 30 that can sing the alma mater.  Anyway, the line is Wherever we go throughout the land our loyalty we sing.  It was the wherever we go part that got me.  In that moment I realized that I would actually have to leave BW.

But thankfully I was able to hold those tears back, pack my stuff up, say goodbye to my best friends and trek it back to Illinois.  Of course I got sick on the ride back, and have just now gotten over it.

Today the shock has kinda worn off me.  That Monday was spent traveling.  My family stopped in BG to check out the campus and see my office.  There were a few friends and colleagues there to say hello to.  It made the upcoming year seem more real to me.  After that I was sick so the driving back mainly consisted of me sleeping in my car (apologies to my mom and sister who had to drive whilst I slept).  Then Tuesday was my mope day.  My dad always calls the day before he has to go to work his "mope day" where he, as you could probably guess, mopes.  I did that all of Tuesday.  I sat around my room doing absolutely nothing.  Wednesday was my "let's make my room presentable" day.  I was moving stuff around because I'll be here until the end of July.  I also applied to some places for summer jobs.

Today was different.  Today was a day that I was feeling well and my room was pretty well put together.  I didn't have anything planned, but I didn't want to waste the day.  I mailed a letter and went to the bank, both very adult things to do.  It was weird because I didn't feel like a college graduate, even though I was wearing my Baldwin Wallace Alumni quarter zip.  I just felt in the middle, like this summer is another transition summer.  This summer is another transition summer, but I don't think it has quite kicked in that at the end of the summer I'll be going back to BW.

This summer is going to be a weird one for sure.

Fair Weather Reader

Recently I finished reading The Fault in Our Stars by John Green.  This book is absolutely fabulous and you should read it if you have the chance.  I've been hearing for a while that this book is really good so I finally decided to read it.  It didn't hurt that the movie is coming out soon and I love all the actors in the movie.  Anyway, I read about half of the book last night between midnight and 3am.  You know the book is good when you start crying just because you have a sense of what's coming.  It reminded me of when I stayed up until 5am reading The Hunger Games or spent an entire day with the latest Harry Potter book, after standing in line for the midnight release.

I am one of those people that believe that one should read the book before seeing the movie adaptation, so I wanted to read The Fault in Our Stars before June.  However I recall when The Hunger Games and Harry Potter last came out.  I was really excited because I had grown up with these characters and I could not wait to see them explode on the screen.  There were people in the theater, however, that had never read the books and were only seeing the movie.

The thought that somebody didn't know these characters and was just seeing the move because it "looked cool" absolutely disgusted me.  These people were not as invested in the story as I was.  They didn't understand the poetic nature of the plot lines.  None of those people had read the books, so they weren't picturing exactly how the set should look in their minds.  They are a blank slate waiting to be drawn on.

I used to think that the only people worse than not reading the books before seeing the movie are the people that only read the book because the movie is coming out.  Those people that just a week before the movie comes out are seen walking around with the book whose cover is the movie adaptation version (those are the WORST).  Those people who just days before the movie come out finally get on the bandwagon talking about how it's the BEST BOOK EVER!! and won't shut up about it.

Those people upset me because I've had weeks, months and even years preparing for some movies.  I had read the last two Lord of the Rings books before either movie came out.  I was years ahead of the curve, so to see someone read it days before the movie came out upset me.  It upset me because they felt like they were the biggest fans of the books series.  Like it was their series, but it wasn't.  It was my series.  They hadn't stayed up really late night after night because they couldn't put the book down.  They didn't have to wait for weeks on end waiting for the next book in the trilogy to come out.  Yet, I would hear time and time again that they "could NOT be more excited".

But then it hit me.  I'm one of those people when it came to The Fault in Our Stars.  Sure I had heard of the book before the movie was even started, but I didn't read it then.  I only started reading it because I really like the main actress in the movie.  Now that I'm finished with the book, I could NOT be more excited for the movie to come out.

I will always be one of those people that believes someone should read the book before the movie comes out, but at least now I know that everybody is taken on a different journey when it comes to books and my journey is not the same as someone who read this book ages ago.  It's not my fault that I loved the book and am now really pumped for the movie, nor is it the fault of the Hunger Games fan who just really likes the plot.

But really, everyone needs to read The Fault in Our Stars.

Homosexuality is WRONG!

The title, I hope, has evoked one of two emotions.  Either you are mad as hell with me and do not understand how I could say that homosexuality is wrong, or you completely agree and assume that this blog post is going to say how right you are.  Keep reading and find out.

As the vice president of the LGBT group on my campus, I have gotten to interact with both sides of this spectrum.  I've had great talks with people who wholeheartedly approve of same sex marriage and also with people who use the term 'fag' or 'faggot' like it's their job.  From these discussions, I've learned a lot about the current state of the people.

My overall advice is this: If you don't approve of gay marriage, don't marry someone who is gay.  That's it.  That's all the 'gay agenda' should be.  If you don't approve of the gay lifestyle, don't put yourself in one.  If I don't like people with red hair, I won't hang around people with red hair.  What I wouldn't even consider doing is going up to any red haired person I could find and tell them their lifestyle is wrong and should change immediately, because their genetic makeup can of course be changed.

Picture yourself.  Find one aspect of your life that is permanent and you were born with.  Maybe you have freckles, or are really short/tall, or even have a weird laugh.  Now picture a group of people telling you that one aspect of your life makes you a lesser person that should not be allowed the same rights as those of the 'correct' type.  Say anyone under 5,10'' cannot get married.  That's not something you can change, yet not you are unable to marry the person you love.

Seems stupid, doesn't it?  That's because it is.  No matter what your own beliefs are, they are your own.  You do not determine what is right or wrong for other people.  You can only speak for yourself.

I am not here saying that everybody should approve of gay marriage.  I know that is something that will most likely never happen.  I am just saying that we shouldn't judge people based on something that can't be changed.

The perk of being human is that we aren't the same.  We just haven't gotten to the point where we accept that everyone is different.  Once we realize that what I do does not affect you, nor vice versa, the world can become something great.

So far to go

I feel like so far I've been doing an okay-ish job with starting to become and adult.  I painted my bedroom at home, cleaned my college room from clutter that I won't need, and overall started taking better care of myself.  However, I've had one big hinderance; Facebook.

Thanks to the fabulous Facebook, I have become a grade A creeper.  With Facebook, people can look at their friends in the comfort of their own home... sometimes without pants on.  When you meet someone new, the first thing you do is attempt to find them on Facebook.  Want to see what you mortal enemy from high school is up to now?  Check Facebook.  Need some dirt on an ex's new significant others?  Check Facebook.

One of my greatest pastimes on Facebook is to find funny articles on Buzzfeed and post them on friends' (mainly my sister's) wall.  Usually the phrases "SO. TRUE." or "They know me so well" precedes the link.  My life can be summed up in 21 GIFS, according to the latest BUZZ.

This always leads to me spilling too much information on Facebook.  I am a proud ENTP, yet I don't need to share which HP/Star Wars/Disney characters I share my Myers Briggs test with.  My friends don't need to hear that I will be "Forever Single" or that I'm "Failing Life", thanks to all the quiz results.

Why do we live in a world where the preferred method of communication is "poking"?  We have all become addicts.  We are addicted to Facebook and social media.  No longer is there that face to face connection.  Now, all there is is a computer screen.  As a society, we have become desensitized to communication.  Instead of using the one-on-one interactions with others, all we need to do is creep on their page for about 5 minutes and there are all the answers.

My name is Julie and I am an addict.  The first step is admitting it.  I am one of those serial "like within one minute of posting" people.  On several occasions, a friend has posted something and within 60 seconds I have liked and most likely commented on their post.  What I need to do is, instead of liking a status, actually talking to the person and saying, "Hey, congrats on the job!" or "OMG your celeb partner in crime is Jennifer Lawrence, ME TOO!" But I don't. Instead I sit on my computer and type "OMG LOL" on my keyboard.  Why must people type LOL when in all reality, they barely even crack a smile.

I think we all need to take a breather and read a book.  Spend some time not over-analyzing your life based on what happens on Facebook.  Now please excuse me as I post this to all forms of social media and critique my writing skills based on how many views this blog gets.

10 things I've learned about life from video games

I love video games, and through my gaming I have seen a lot of parallels between the video games I'm playing and life lessons.  This is for those out there who love video games/ don't see the point in video games/ people who think video games stunt your growth.

1. If you just stand there, nothing is going to happen

When you are gaming, the purpose is to keep moving. Levels can only progress once the player has made it to the end.  Like life, one needs to keep moving forward.  Just standing there, someone isn't going to get to enjoy life.  The rest of the game is going on, but you will never know if you don't pick up the controller and move to the right.

2. Completing a whole game seems crazy. Start by just working on achievements

This comes from my non-futuristic way of thinking.  I like to just go with the flow, which means that my goals in life are not 30 year goals.  Yes, the purpose of playing a video game is to beat the entire game, but that seems like a daunting task.  I like to take the game level by level.  If I see the game as little stepping stones that will overall help me reach my goal, I enjoy the game a lot better.

3.You decided what games you want to play

Just because everybody is playing Call of Duty doesn't mean you have to.  If you want to play computer games or just random flash games online, that's totally fine.  In life, you get to decide what you do.  Nobody else is playing your video game but you, just like nobody else is living your life but you

4. Got stuck somewhere? Turn off your system and come back later

There have been so many times in which I have been stuck on the same level or same boss fight and not been able to beat it.  In those cases, I put my controller down and walk away for a little bit.  I get the chance to clear my head and then come back.  If you are stuck in life with a decision you don't know the answer to, take a step back, walk away to clear your head, then come back.  Most of the time the answer is right in front of your face, you just didn't see it before.

5. The most famous games are not always the most fun to play

Everybody was talking about how much fun the new __________ game was.  I tried it once and didn't like it.  That's perfectly fine.  Sometimes what everybody else thinks is great isn't worth your time.  There are times in life when everybody else is doing one thing, talking about how much fun it is, but it might not be what's right for you.  Don't just go with the flow and conform to what everyone else is doing.

6. Sometimes you need to blow off some steam

The main purpose of video games for me is a way for me to relax.  I love coming back to my room after a long day of classes and meetings and just be able to sit back, relax and kill zombies.  Everybody needs something to blow off steam once in a while.  Whether it is video games, music or hanging out with friends.  The key to a less stressful life is to find something that keeps you calm.

7. Game the way you want to

There are plenty of people who take gaming seriously.  You don't have to be one of those people.  If you are a recreational player who games for pure enjoyment, that's great! You do you.  Everybody games differently, just like everybody lives differently.  You need to discover how you game and not let anyone else tell you differently.

8. Nobody likes the gamers who showboat

I hate those gamers that constantly talk about how great they are.  They have beaten this many enemies or completed this many achievements.  Nobody likes those people.  Don't be one of them.  There are those people in life too.  These will be the people that say things like, "I don't want to tell you what to do, but if you want to do well you should..." Don't let those people throw you off your groove in life.  They suck, you're awesome.

9. Someone might be on a higher level than you, but that doesn't make them better

Just because someone has already completed the level you are on, doesn't mean they did a better job.  They might have missed something that you didn't.  They might have blown through the level, but you're taking your time and enjoying it more.  They might have started sooner than you.  All of these are reasons why someone would be further along than you in gaming and in life, but that doesn't mean they are better than you.  Never for a second think that's true.  Unless you are both going head to head in competition, then they might have beaten you. But in everyday gaming, just focus on your own game.

10. Save often

I take this to mean show appreciation.  In gaming, when you save, that means you have a baseline so if you mess up later, you can always come back to this point.  Everybody needs a support system in their lives so if stuff really starts to hit the fan, you have people you can go to for advice or support.  My friends and family are my save button.  I know that no matter what happens, I will have them and I can always go back to that point.